her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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