Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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