I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
