just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
