their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
