I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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