so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
we're so committed to being not committed
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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