All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
