someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
