At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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