I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
