operation harelip BJ is a go
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
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