I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
