we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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