HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
