Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
