Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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