The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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