...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
