You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
