Your tits are I can't wait for
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
