its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
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