I hate all girls vehemently.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Randomize
