Whod you bang
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
