Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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