Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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