I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
i now understand why vodka
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
