I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
soo... how was my night?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
