Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
