thus making me awesome and them whores
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
