There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
