She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
high people should be assigned attendants
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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