so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
