My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Still dying that you shit outside
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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