The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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