That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
