you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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