just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize