brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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