defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
