i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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