Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
