At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
