I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
