nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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