whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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