I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
