he referred to my room as the tit cave...
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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