I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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