This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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