I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Randomize